The Gobbos, The Skaven and The Ugly…Dice

My goblin team the Littul Runtz are into their second league after winning the Clean Cup without losing or drawing a single game. I thought it would always be like that, I thought the goblins from my tabletop days were still invincible, undeafeatable, cunning, lucky and still great fun. Turns out that only the “great fun” part is most correct.

Green moon...but not made of cheese.

And here is the team before the match in their dressing room as yet un injured and full of worms.

I think they are vegetarian trolls or this lot would be in danger.

They are 2nd in their league despite a brutal match at the hands of the Mittledorf Smashers (a human team) which equalled in a 0-0 draw with no injuries, not bad for gobbos. So to stand a chance of getting into the play offs, a win here would be nice.

My opponents, The Rotten Rats, a Skaven team from some ungodly sewer who thankfully posses no behemoth of a giant rat so next to my 2 trolls the ratties should become mincemeat in no time, if I can catch them. That’s a big IF.

Heads I win, Tails you lose...HAH! told you.

The coin toss goes my way (heads ftw) I opt to recieve becuase I want to get my trolls to hit the ratties asap. The Skaven may not have a strength advantage against the goblins but the less that are standing up on their turn, the less they can run at my poor goblins in the back field.

Gutpuke and Riverfart wade into the ratties 3 linemen, one crumples like he wasn’t even there the second crumples like he wasn’t ev….

...Gutpuke fails me.

It is a good job that I do my blocking last. All of my gobbos have moved to help protect the ball carrier who is the level 3 Snakrit with his sure hands and feet. He wouldn’t fail me like Gutpuke. Not that any of this matters, the ratties run through my defensive line and charge straight at Snakrit who gets one in the back. The next turn went a little like the first in that my fanatic Skegit managed to put his giant spiked ball into his own head rather than the Stormvermin as such the Rotten Rats are a touchdown up in only their 2nd turn. So this first run pretty much set a trend for the rest of game. Thankfully a little on both sides.

Oh the joys of that word when it works in your favor...oh the joys.

All was not lost however. The 2nd half started with only Riverpuke able to play (Gutpuke’s contract may come under scrutny after this match) and my old faithfull friend Shekzit and his faithfull friend Mr.Chainsaw. Together they planned on ruining as many Skaven as possible. It sort of went that way, in the ruining part, but Riverfart and Shekzit had nothing to do with it. Some turns in and 2 plucky Goblins teamed up to kill a gutter runner and then injure a thrower.

REVENGE! beware the terrible two

With this sort of behaviour the rest of the Runtz followed suit ganging up on Skaven around the ball carrier. It was quite inspiring to see the rest of the team kick, punch and chew their way through the ratties.  Two more left the pitch on a stretcher..well they sank into the pitch but they were gone and it was a free run up to the endzone!

Notice my opponents smack talk...childish.

With nothing to stop him, Gubbsniv drives over the line for the equalizer on the last turn!…well I delayed it from 2 turns previous to do more harm to the ratties than they really deserved but well, how often do you see Gobbos outnumbering their opponents?

So the match came to a 1-1 draw and the fantastic comeback of the Littul Runtz to get an equalizer was just staggering, surely that goes down as match of the week with the highlight reel being filled with moments from the second halfs butchery.

Lost fans...LOST FANS?!? we clawed for that last touchdown and you desert us? oh we will find where you live! your knees are not safe!!

Well…you B***ARDS… there’s no pleasing some people, elves, gobbos, mythical beasts.

So with that the Littul Runtz maintain their second spot in the league behind the Bramble Blockers a woodelf team who have 9 players available for their next match against me, and it looks like their treeman has only 1 MA due to a smashed ankle injury. Now like all Goblin coaches I am thinking, “how can I exploit that?”.