Blood Bowl – Collectin Gobbo Teef. Day 2

A player on the Skull Takers team approached coach TooNu before the game and grunted something of a request, well, due to his size and strength who would argue with such a player? Well Coach TooNu doesn’t really appreciate being told what to do or when to do it but on this occasion the player did make a strong arguement…lifting your coach up off his feet by your super unnatural horns gives you that edge. And so Ram’em Downs “request” was worked into the plans for the following match.

Goblin Clowns...is there anything truly more evil?

The ‘Alf Pint Punterz coach can at least spend his inducement cash wisely. An extra reroll could be valuable if they can get a Goblin with the ball launched into the air by a Troll successfully, such as their stature allows. Is that play on the cards for the Punterz? We shall have to see.

Kicking in the wrong direction on purpose...it's in the plan of course!

Despite the failed kick off going wide into the Spectator stands, the Goblin coach decided that the best Goblin to take the ball would be one at the front just bheind the pair of Trolls. Having experienced playing against a Goblin team a few times previous, this is not a smart move. A quick block rush and that guy is losing the ball faster than an alzheimers patient losing his keys.

Despite seeing his mates come apart when that giant spiked ball hit them, Laly Tusk challenges the Goblin...who laughs maniacally.

And so the ball bounced around between a few Goblins as one would fall and another would take his place as “grand ball carrier”. Nizwir here was let loose and ruined some SKull Takers along the way. Fanatics can move 3 spaces safely each turn, Up, Down, Left, and Right. They don’t always go where you want them to and anything in their way get’s to make an armor save and is otherwise blocked. If the Fanatic tries to move a 4th or 5th square, then they must make a sprint check, if they fail they get to make an armor save. So, deadly as all hell but unpredictable.

While Nizwir deals pain all by himself, the Skull Takers dish it out to the other Punterz.

Injuring Gobbs is a full time job. They break so easily and it is all too tempting to get an extra block in before doing something safer, like moving or getting back up. The problem is that when you are blokcing and hurting all of the time, you don’t see what can happen. Mr.Greenskin below tookt he liberty of reminding us all that Blood Bowl doesn’t give a shit about you and will make sure the ball bounces into a Goblins hands, who then drops it, only for the ball to land in another Goblins hands who then runs it in for a fast Touchdown.

The celebratory 'dry-hump' dance.

Sometimes they get lucky like this. Mostly though, the games are usually about how many goblins you can hurt during the match.

the skull indicates DEATH, but he rolled for an apothecary and got badly injured instead.

With all of the Goblins falling over and being told they can’t play with a groin strain/broken neck/fractured leg, Ty-Nogors runs in his first touchdown of the match making it 1-1 on the last turn before halftime.

Another Touchdown for the Running Back supremo, Ty-Nogors.

Halftime or “reflecting time” is a period of self thought for coach TooNu. A time where he can take stock of the situation, calculate the possibility of winning and understand his players needs out on the field. If it wasn’t a goblin team, all of that would matter but as it stands the only play to execute was, “smash them puny greenskin stunty runts into the ground and split them apart!”. Poetic right? the second half get’s underway.

Extra rerolls seem to be a speciality of the Punterz playstyle.

Spectators to Blood Bowl matches are constantly wondering how a Goblin could kick a ball down the pitch, that is almost the same height they are. Most put it down to evolution of Goblin legs from being beaten for getting it wrong. Duck and roll they can do naturally, but kick a ball over a Minotaur into the opposing half? Blood bowl – game of miracles.

There is ALWAYS one who doesn't turn up to practice, and ruins the cheer because they don't know the moves.

With the ball firmly in the hands of Ty who this game had no trouble picking the ball up coach TooNu thought back to his conversation with Ram’em Down…and then sweat built up on his forehead as he prayed Ty would do as he said. Not one for sharing the glory the false gods have bestowed on him and him alone, Ty would prove that even a Chaos team can execute a throwing game perfectly.

A perfect throw and a perfect catch gives Ram'em Down his chance!

Ram’em Down had been feeling…down, about his playing of late. Hurting things and smashing bones, causing blood loss and general pain dealing is all fine. Though being on the list of players who scored a touchdown in a game of Blood Bowl would give him the edge over his other larger opponents on centre field. Not normally given the chance due to their incredible bulk and strength potential, the Minotaur player is the last option for a coach to score a touchdown. However, threatening coach TooNu seemed to work and Ram’em had his opportunity now that Ty places the ball expertly into his gigantic hands.

Ok so there you have it, an impressive collection of Injuried Goblins...and it's not even the final.

And while the ball handling (cheeky) was going on, the rest of the Skull Takers were making sure that the Goblin apothecaries were earning their gold and that the false gods were getting their blood qouta for a match. There were far more Goblins off the pitch, than on it by this point.

Ram'em Down, the true the master of the dramatic finish.

Sadly for coach TooNu’s heart condition, Ram’em Down managed to run all the way to the Goblin endzone and then just stopped. He stopped 1 yard from scoring that touchdown he so very much wanted. He stopped and refused to move. the crowd were on their feet screaming at him to take another step but the egotistical Minotaur wouldn’t give any indication that he was going to move. Instead he started right back at the crowd daring them to come and MAKE HIM move. And after 2-3 turns of disagreeing with the spectators and fans alike, he took one small step for the Takers, one Giant leap for Minotaur kind scoring his first touchdown bringing the overall score to 2-1 Skull Takers.

A life's dream fulfilled for this lucky cow.

Minotaurs as it appears, are quite arrogant and self centered but damn usefull and dangerous as spilling a Dwarfs beer.

"The Troll throws the ball...while the Goblin still has it in his hands...OUCH that didn't look like a safe landing to me Jim"

The last few moments of the game were spent kicking severly battered goblins about and making sure the second Troll took an injury roll but not before they tried that last minute desperate plan. Which of course failed as the Goblin while looking promising flying through the air; couldn’t seem to find his feet and instead landed on his face where no amount of rerolls would help him, creating a turnover that would signal the end of the match.

A football match? or a slaughter? The false gods are satisfied with this match.

If the dice had gone the other way, the Goblins might have pulled through with more sneaky touchdowns like their first. A chaos team who is not ontop of his attacking game can lose quite easily to a more prepared, luckier Goblin offence. Though, not today.

Laly Tusk picks up his 2nd MVP award ever, earning him the next level and the Block skill.

Laly Tusk get’s the MVP for insulting the Fanatic so harshly and so much over the first half that the Fanatic, Nizwir, strangled himself with his own ball and chain in an over sealous attempt at flattening the baiting Beastman. Comedy and genius in one play.

And while slightly uncommon to mention the opposing teams MVP, Coach TooNu was interested who might have received the award on the Goblin team. The touch down scorer perhaps? He was the only one who did anything correctly for certain.

HAH! he IS injured.Nizwir gets mentioned here for being a true pain in the ass.

Ah yes, him. Well, I guess he did a good job at the start of the match having single handedly taken the entire right side of the field by himself.


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